Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Where is my happy ending?

A friend of mine asked in her facebook status recently; "Why do they show us these love stories that will never happen, they just set us up for disappointment!"

How true my friend. So in honor of K2 (my clever nickname for her) and following in the steps of books like He's Just Not That Into You I offer up some advice/knowledge on the subject of love and happily ever after...

1) The way to a man's heart is not his stomach..its actually a complicated path that starts with his eyes, travels downward to his *cough* ya know, and then heads toward his brain. If you can successfully navigate the path, you may get a chance to cook for him, in which case, his stomach may play a small part in the final result of the relationship.

2) You are most likely never going to get a makeover that knocks his socks off. In real life, the number of pretty girls who go around looking "ugly" until someone runs a brush through their hair and plucks their eyebrows (a la Miss Congeniality or She's All That) is pretty slim. Be realistic, a new outfit, hairstyle, or lip gloss is probably lost on most guys...they're not too into that sort of thing, in case you haven't noticed. And oh yeah, the fat girl who loses a bunch of weight and suddenly has boys all over her...that doesn't happen very often either. And lets face it...even if you get a killer makeover and suddenly look like Angelina Jolie's kid sister...do you really want a guy so shallow that even though he's known you forever and knows what a great personality you have, only now shows interest in you? At least go for a shallow guy who doesn't know you at all, that way you can pretend he likes you for your personality.

3) Love at first sight is a myth. Lust at first sight...very real! Do not mistake the latter for the former. Its true that you may feel an instant spark or connection with someone...this does not mean you are meant to be together forever. That's not to say you shouldn't pursue it, see where it goes, but lets not be Romeo and Juliet about it. You do realize they had known each other for, like, 20 minutes when they decided they were in love. Also...its fiction. Try and remember that people.

4) Don't settle for less than you deserve...but don't pass on someone because they aren't everything you imagined when you were 12. If you feel I've been harsh on the male half of our society, don't worry, this is where the girls get it. Listen up ladies! He may not look like Brad Pitt, but really, who does? Is he nice? Funny? Interesting? Do you have common interests and ideals? Does he love you? If the answer to all these questions is yes, and the thing holding you back it that he's a 2 and you're an 8...get over yourself! You want someone who will be with you forever...and in fifty years neither one of you will look that good.

5) Lastly, remember this: You are a valuable person, whether or not you have a significant other. Nothing frustrates me more than a girl (or guy) who feels like they are worthless because they aren't in a relationship. Or that they can't live without their "one true love." (Hey Twilight fans...ring any "Bella"s?) Being single has its negatives, but it can be a positive as well. Use that time to work on yourself. Are you where you want to be in life? Have you done everything you want to do? Make sure you are able to live life no matter what..single or in a relationship. There is no guarantee that even if you fall in love and get married, that you will never be single again. Look at the divorce rate! Or, your spouse could die in a car accident, from cancer, or the swine flu. (Okay, maybe not swine flu) My point is this: Yes Cher, there is life after love, and I believe in it.

You may not have understood that Cher refrence...

You may think that I'm too cynical...

You may be right.

But that doesn't make what I said any less true.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

The Trouble With School Is, They Always Try and Teach The Wrong Lessons

It's not that I have anything against the idea of school. I love learning, and I have had teachers in my life that made me want to go to class. My main problem is that 75% of what I learned in school is useless in the real world. Certainly there are applications of math and science in the real world. And there is certainly some proof behind that old "those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it" phrase you always hear. But, in general, schools do not prepare you for life after graduation. Home Economics, which many schools do offer as an elective, is not nearly enough. They try to cram everything into one class. I think it would be more appropriate to separate the subjects and teach a class on each issue.

With this in mind I have prepared a sampling of classes I wish had been offered in my high school.

Finance: Where you learn to balance a check book and budget to live within your means, and they should certainly teach you about the danger of credit cards. Students should also learn how to do their own taxes. Even if you don't end up doing your own taxes later in life, knowing how the government figures out what you owe them is important.

Cooking: Baking cookies will not cut it. Everyone should know how to make at least five dinners. Healthy meals that aren't expensive or difficult to prepare. My generation lives on frozen pre-prepared meals and fast food. Its not healthy and its not economical. (I actually didn't need a class like this, as my mother is a throwback from the olden days and taught me not only how to cook, but how to can vegetables and make jam, but I have many friends who can't make anything more difficult than mac & cheese)

Speech: It's true that many schools do offer a class like this, but it is not always mandatory. it is important to know how to speak before a group of people. You never know when this situation might pop up, but I can guarantee you that it does.

Health: I don't just mean a teacher who tells you to eat right, and exercise. I think students need to learn about the health care system in America. Insurance need to be explained. Also included should be a comprehensive Sex Ed. Most schools teach either abstinence, or they offer a short session on birth control options. Both of these are bad. Students should know and understand all of the effects of sex, on their physical well being and their mental and emotional levels as well. If they choose to have sex anyway they need to be clear that no birth control is 100% at preventing pregnancy, or STDs. And they need to be familiar with all the options.

Employment: <--(So not an accurate name for what is to follow, but its all I've got.) Students need to understand how to create a resume and cover letter. They also need practical experience on how to conduct themselves in an interview. Additionally, students should be made aware of the reality of the work force at that particular time. They need to understand that just because they want to be on Broadway, doesn't mean they should major in theatre. (I'm not saying you shouldn't follow your dreams, but I do think people should be practical when picking a major...you are shelling out a ton of cash for this degree...are you going to be able to use it?)

Reading: Trying to cram reading into English classes is a major problem in America. English should be about proper sentence structure, how to write a good paper, research techniques, etc. Reading should be about learning to expand your horizons by trying new authors and genres. Students need to understand that there is no easier way to expand your mind than to read. Reading increases vocabulary, can help with understanding social situations, and can increase your base of factual knowledge. In addition, reading anything, even a romance novel or magazine article, exercises your brain and keeps it younger.

What do you think? Am I completely crazy, or would you also have appreciated knowing some of these things before you graduated and stepped out into the "real" world?